Funny Jokes - Texas Talkin'

The engine's runnin' but ain't nobody driving = Not too smart

As welcome as a skunk at a lawn party = An unwelcome person

Tighter than bark on a tree = Stingy

Big hat, no cattle = All talk, no action

We've howdied but we ain't shook yet = We've met, but haven't been formally introduced

He thinks the sun come up just to hear him crow = He thinks his s#%! doesn't stink

She's got tongue enough for ten rows of teeth = She's a talker

It's so dry the trees are bribin' the dogs = Rain would be nice

Just because a chicken has wings doesn't mean it can fly = Appearances can be deceiving

This ain't my first rodeo = I've been around the block

He looks like the dog's been keepin' him under the porch = U-G-L-Y

They ate supper before they said grace = They're living in sin

Time to paint your butt white and run with the antelope = Stop arguing and do as you're told

As full of wind as a corn-eating horse = A braggart

You can put your boots in the oven, but that doesn't make them biscuits = You can say whatever you want, but that doesn't change a thing